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Make free time into quality time for yourself

30/3/2020

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We live in times where being active all the time is equalled to being successful. While this is not necessarily the truth, most of us will have bought into this idea to some degree. Let’s be clear about this: I’m not saying this is completely wrong. It can have a disastrous effect on your mental health, though.

Since we have at least half adopted that line of thought, it is increasingly difficult to do something that cannot be vaguely qualified as ‘productive’. The trouble is that quality time to yourself is only beneficial to yourself and while it is useful to you it never registers as ‘productive’ to others. And that leads to two effects: others will see you doing nothing of consequence and you’ll feel bad for being unproductive. Let’s tackle those:
First of all, you are NOT responsible for what others think! Doing something that you believe to be of benefit to you does not require you to make that fact clear to anyone else. If you are feeling more relaxed, more rested or more balanced in your own self, this will show in ways that go beyond sheer productivity. Those who really need to see progress in your general demeanour will see it.

As for ‘feeling bad for doing nothing productive’: stop it! I know from personal experience that this is a tough call. You’ll need to find out for yourself what positive effects flow from taking time to yourself and do things that bring you joy rather than end up with a practical outcome that can be measured in money, jobs done or simply ticking things off on your to-do list. Once you realise just how much you benefit from quality time, you’ll be in a much better position to defend your actions when questioned about them.

A controversial statement about free time: we all have more of that than we think. You’ll probably disagree and argue that you are always busy and have no free time at all. I would invite you to think about how often you find yourself confronted with free time and you decide to fill it with something ‘useful’ rather than allow yourself to sit down with a cup of coffee and watch the world go by for a while!

Are you feeling guilty about taking time to yourself when there is so much you ‘should’ get done? Once more, wouldn’t you agree that you are better able to finish tasks swiftly when you are relaxed? If you can even remotely agree with that thought, maybe it’s time to follow that idea and make the time to relax.

What is the remedy, then? Start off with empowering yourself to take breaks, regularly! Then do something you like doing that is not necessarily ‘productive’, like having a cup of tea in front of the window, watering your plants, watching clouds from the balcony, meditate for 10 minutes, read something that raises your spirits… either way you’ll find that these things invigorate you. Whatever you are being told: life is not just about productivity and efficiency. Sometimes it’s necessary to just stop everything and smell the roses.
If you have enjoyed reading this, you may find these other articles interesting:
  • Take time for yourself
  • Sometimes isolating yourself can be heaven
  • Find the positive
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    Hi, my name is Tilo Flache. My current mission: help my clients declutter mind and space.

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